law of attraction | My Experiments with Sanity

These days, I think about you, my fellow blogvillians. I think I mentioned it before, about how I don’t have to be accountable to many. But now that I’ve met you, I feel more accountable. My therapist the past few months has been an intern. Interns rock because they have all this hope and belief that there just may be a chance for you to escape insanity.

They have fun things like sand boxes and hand you print outs of stuff you said you were interested in. The lady before my current therapist retired. I think I may have sent her there…just kidding.

But that being said, she wasn’t really all in the game. So, as my new therapist said the other day, I became my own therapist. I was showing her the Dapper Manual and Dapper Inspiration books.

Dapper Soldiers, please start a Dapper Inspiration book yesterday. A Dapper Inspiration book is a notebook, or pieces of paper if you don’t have a notebook. You cut out images, articles, quotes that move you and glue, tape, staple…adhere to said paper. Then, overtime you’ve amassed this reference book, tailored just for YOU!

I bought a hefty stack of Oprah magazines from the thrift store for $0.25 each. Great magazine for positive quotes and inspiration.

It’s not all chick stuff either, guys. Inspiration and introspection is not just a female role but a male’s as well. Some local native cultures believe that the man has to develop the female side, as the female must develop the male. Yin yang basically. We should have a good balance to be the most successful in life.

I now have, honestly, 4 Dapper Inspiration books. They’re categorized, of course. Stuff on camping here, sustainability here, self-betterment here. When I find new things to add to the area, sometimes I go thru said category and cover up the info/thing I have already obtained. There’s always a parking space, in the books and in the world.

That’s the beauty of it. You’re mind can’t distinguish between if something is real or not, it only knows emotions. And lucky for us, we’ve got some powerful emotions.

Try this. Shut your eyes. Ok, wait, that won’t work. When you finish reading this, close you’re eyes. Lift your lips up into a slight, Mona Lisa-esque smile. Sit up straight. Take ten of those deep breaths that woosh air into every nook and cranny of you’re shell. And begin to see what it is you are currently in need/desire of.

But see it all the way thru. Is it a nice piece of fruit? A strawberry just perfectly ripe? Taste it then. Feel the sensations. Be totally there, eating that perfectly plump juicy ripe berry. I miss strawberries.

But for you, maybe it’s a car, a lover, a trillion dollars or ten dollars. Whatever it may be, do some dapper dreaming and experience that which you seek in all of its fullest and deepest dimensions. And build your dapper inspiration manual, yesterday.

Until we meet again, my dear Blogvillians,

B. Wright

I got to thinking about how far I’ve come over the years. I decided to share a glimpse ‘o me, what I was like, etc. and who I have grown into today with much difficult work. Although you know, of course, everything awful that has happened to you is a blessing in disguise.

When I discovered that, man did life become instantly better. A flat tire? Great, I need practice. Broke the screen on my iPhone and feel ghetto? I need some work on humility and don’t forget being grateful for the bounty I have available. We all have available. This abundant world. All this abundance shit? Law of Attraction? New to me in the past few years. But I’m running with it.

It totally makes sense to me and I’ve seen it work more times than I could ever remember. Not as much as I would like it to occur but I’m a believer. Rambling. Again. For some, the rambling is normal. How else does the mind work? To those dear readers that aren’t blessed with bipolar, I apologize for the digression and lets get on with this reflection.

1995: 15, sophomore in high school, smoking pot numerous times a day, dressing ridiculously scandalous at 90lbs and 34C, skipping class most of the time, “dated” guys who either dealt drugs or came from money so they could buy drugs. I put quotations around dated because getting smashed and fucking isn’t dating per se but I know there’s some fain of heart out there. Don’t read my shit then if you’re one, or at least at your own risk. There. Warning issued. Now I can finally sleep. Kidding.

1995: big into acid, big into getting fucked up as much as possible. I bussed tables at a once shwanky restaurant in my neighborhood. A night’s tip out was perfect for a pack of Reds, a little to pitch in on a bag with friends, get a 40oz. of some malt liquor and tip the bum for getting the smokes and booze. Ahhh, the good old days.

I guess I started to work for my meds pretty early on. I also babysat a couple times a week as well. I also got lunch money and sometimes when my dad would have a big wad of cash all rolled up hidden somewhere for some reason beyond me, I’d slide some bills out. It’s all about revenue streams flowing.

I also had a big klepto problem at this age. Shame to admit, but I even stool from people I liked who hosted soirees, aka keggers, while their parents were out of town. But only if it was a house where there was plenty. Fish tanks for walls and such. I’d like to send out an apology to all those out there, including the big corporations. Stealing is wrong. I would never do it again and stopped when I turned 18. Not worth it to get busted for another pair of expensive risqué panties.

My older brother ratted me out once when he got caught for stealing hood ornaments. He went thru a brief rebellion period, skateboarding and such. He got jumped by his rebellious friends and then that was the end of that phase. He said how do you think she can afford all those things she has? She steals them. Thrown under the bus for sure.

My parents are perfect and exactly who I was meant to be born into. In fact, I believe I chose them, as we all choose our parents for they have a problem that we as the next generation must solve. Or shit, at least try to solve. Then if you breed, you shit your problem/burden onto your child and so on down the line until we’ve solved all issues. We will evolve to such a high frequency of love and deep understanding of our connection with ALL that is, we just become some ginormous (wow, no spell check? That’s a real word now? I thought it was slang.) some ginormous symbiotic energy wave spreading love deep into the cosmos every which way. Wow. Won’t that be fun?